lolamatopoeia: (marilyntiredhead)
I think I've been grumpier today than I have been in a long, long time. I was curt and bitchy and short tempered and miserable all day. I felt like crap and I just could not shake it. I had to wake up early today for my 8:30AM practice run at the Running Room which was great but fuck I wish I had had more sleep in me. I could not get to sleep last night and even when I did get a little shut-eye time I would keep waking up for no reason and then struggle to go back to sleep again. It was so frustrating. I haven't had such a hard time sleeping in a while and I don't even know what caused it and now I'm scared about it happening again tonight. I mean, I had to have a nap today - yeah, I NAPPED. I never nap. I hate napping - but then there I was, me and the dog, napping:

me and puppy napping

My pillow was soaked in drool.

It could have been because I decided to watch a vampire movie after 10:30PM last night. It was 'Twilight' - FINALLY, LOOOOOOOVED it - which isn't meant to be a scary vampire movie at all, just gut wrenching and dreamy and lovely with a touch of disturbing and creepy, I just have a thing with vampires. Childhood fear. Did I mention that I am 26 years old and I am still afraid of the dark?

In any case, lately I've been getting to thinking about the advice that my old Prof gave me about writing every day until I figure out what I want to write about. I've been feeling a lot more anxious about this task. I still don't know what I'm meant to write about. When I was younger I used to write a lot of fantasy stories, but now that I'm older my writing is mainly just here and this is just ... well, it is what it is. I need to figure this stuff out.

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lolamatopoeia

July 2009

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